Sunday, February 20, 2005
i am thinking for you; on your behalf. (that's if you get my drift)
i wonder what she says to you
when you're alone together
my imagination is so cruel
picturing you holding hands
and doing the things that we planned
sharing everything day and night
making memories
you're playing love scenes without me
and she's got my role
starring as your leading lady
and stealing the show
i wanted to be with you forever
we belonged together
but my affection was too strong
i played it all wrong, chasing you
and ruining things like i do
i'd give anything to turn back time
and get over you
you're playing love scenes without me
and she's got my role
starring as your leading lady
and stealing the show
am i just wasting my time
still believing someday you'll realise
they're my lines
what she says to you
for the rest of your lives
you're playing love scenes without me
and she's got my role
starring as your leading lady
and stealing the show
1:03:00 PM
her point of view;
Monday, February 14, 2005
it's valentine's and we all have to go to school :|
HOW LOVELY :)
today, i saw the cutest (and i mean cutest) indian guy outside cineleisure.
so he looks a little northern indian with sagged pants and worn with a brown striped polo tee on the top.
he's got the neatest brown hair and smile :)
and now he's gone, just like that.
one step, two step, three steps and a distance.
someone shout 'serendipity' please?
apart from that whole ORDEAL, my ears are itching from my new pair of diamond earrings.
i've an effing pair of sensitive ears that only yearn to wear expensive clean silver earrings.
i can practically feel my heartbeats through my piercings and it's all heated up.
HOOHA.
HAPPY FUCKIN' VALENTINES DAY!
xthe unlovedx
8:40:00 PM
her point of view;
Sunday, February 13, 2005
i like my beef noodles without beansprouts and spring onions.
i like my beef noodles mixed with both the meatball and the beef.
i detest ice lemon tea.
but today, for some unknown reason:
i had my beef noodles with extra beansprouts and spring onions without knowing i had asked for more.
i had my drink changed to ice lemon tea.
then i walked away slowly, forgetting my drink and my change from the cash.
it only hit me when the stall auntie kept shouting for me from afar.
so i got back to my seat where my mother was already waiting for me and as i sat, she wondered why i had a molehill of beansprouts on my noodles.
i'm thinking: 'you know, i really don't know.'
what i need now is a leg-shaving session and muchmuchmuch sleep :)
________
valentine's day is just around the corner.
in fact, that corner is just a day away.
yet againAGAINagain, like every other year, i'm single :) / :(
[you decide on the smiley]
it'd be perfect and very much satisfaction if i were to recieve:
(in no order of preference)
1. chocolates
2. big redredred roses
3. sappy written cards
4. those really pretty scented candles
5. my longgoneused perfume; lanvin
6. or whatever you have planned for me
seriously, i miss love.
in greater detail, i miss gabriel.
OHFUCKINGBIGDEAL.
OR i might as well have tuition on vee day.
becks, me, algebra and a glass of water; how romantic is that?
we'll see.
"again i go unnoticed . . ."
1:33:00 AM
her point of view;
Saturday, February 12, 2005
is other people's pain, your pleasure?
i'm starting to think it is becoming.
i was pretty back to normal for the past week, except for the fact that it does ring in my head once too many times but not until we spoke last night.
that convo just made me feel more angsty then i had ever been.
it's thanks to that late hour, i wasn't screaming my inners out.
you tried to reason out everything.
no matter what and how you do it, it'll never change my point of view and you and whatever that comes along (you get my drift).
you know, what makes me more disturbed is the fact that you lied about something already so disturbing, HER.
chances i asked and you gave them willingly and we did outline boundaries and stated our terms.
those were meant to save the relationship.
i did what was necessary, did you?
i did without my uptightness and i understood your every problem.
NO, i wasn't forced to do it and clearly, it was an effort to resolve our earlier disputes and not let everything fall apart.
do you see positive instead of negative?
then you lied, it all fell apart for reasons that you were not ready to commit into anything and that time wasn't easy for you.
you had school and projects and you felt that there wasn't enough time for us.
i understood your jamming sessions, and your late nights out but then it was all for a different reason.
cutting to the point, she can apologise to me in every way possible but i'll never forget.
they say it's easy to forgive and hard ever to forget.
but looking at the way she treated the whole issue, where am i to forgive?
when am i ever to forget her rudeness and crudeness.
NEVER, as simple as that.
i understood you, where's your understanding towards me?
there never was.
and honey, it's pointless claiming you still care and you'd do whatever is needed.
there's nothing more you can do.
you've done enough damage and hurt, what else more can you do?
what i want, can you fulfil?
I HIGHLY DOUBT.
2:38:00 PM
her point of view;
Thursday, February 10, 2005
]
this wasn't meant to be.
despite already having the same jacket but in different gender fits and different buy times, we met wearing the same outfit; adidas jacket and adidas shorts.
HOW EFFING COINCIDENTAL.
we felt awfullyawfullyawfully stupid?
to update, my chinese new year has been oh-so-ever-eventful.
last year, i visited one house with merely earning forty dollars.
this year, i visited NO house and earning a hundred from my daddy in one packet.
so maybe we don't have many to visit since daddy's the only chinese.
we only had the usual; home-made reunion dinner of steamboat.
i guess i'll do without being a money face this year and just be contented :)
BUTBUTBUT i'm going to rush to get my black birkenstocks and lanvin as soon as shops open.
HAHA.
bruised and battered by your words
dazed and shattered how it hurts
haven't I always loved you
6:28:00 PM
her point of view;
Monday, February 07, 2005
i am next on the depression list.
and therefore, i am not going to blog the next few hours/ days/ weeks and hopefully it would not turn into months.
as it is, my last post was end-january.
and here are my little updates:
1. i got my ugly wuggly fuggly tattoo covered up.
2. a new hair-do which i am loving.
3. i am single and no valentine's date whatsoever.
4. i am not mugging and i'm far from being focussed.
5. i hate the adulterous pair.
6. how about tony and guy's graduation party at indochine; fashion show accompanied by a $7.60 chocolate milkshake.
7. i'm frustrated and the confusion is escalating.
8. losing him; priceless.
enough.
11:13:00 PM
her point of view;
