Friday, September 23, 2005
i will not remove any entry in my blog.
(it is where i form my opinions)
first, your argument has no substance?
with your intelligence level, i will phrase things simple for your understanding.
i brought up the past to remind you of how stupid (it's the only word) an error you made.
everyone would understand the meaning of the term: 'how now brown cow'
but my dear, you didn't.
in a second, you got raging mad, without understanding who it was directed to, you had this thinking that it was mirdat.
get over your insecurities, please?
about the recent issue, you looked beyond my honest intentions.
it's your decision if you want to get angry.
i will have to understand that you are just a very insecure girl who thinks every other girl is out to get your boyfriend.
seriously, no one has time for that or it's just impossible because he is out of reach.
since you want me not to care for yourself and him, i'll leave my entries intact.
if i were to remove them, it would mean i care for him so much that i wouldn't anyone to see his name, wouldn't it?
i guess there's no use for the yellow ribbon project because when i supported an imprisoned friend, a whole mess came out of it?
OH WELL, BESIDES OUR FALLING OUT, MY DAY IS JUST GETTING BETTER.
-
would leaving an entry on my blog mean i've no respect for myself?
and did i mention that i wanted to know what prison is like?
maybe mirdat can tell me what it's like when he gets released.
and you're insecurities have taken better of you.
i wonder how you could change a simple act of support to become one that's so disgusting.
disgust in the form that i'd want to take your imprisoned boyfriend.
firstly, it's highly impossible and secondly, i have better things to do.
so clara tan, i'll let you go believe whatever nonsense you're stirring up on your own.
-
something more eyecatching.
my prom outfit will be either the foreground or background.
1:52:00 PM
her point of view;
Thursday, September 22, 2005
you're the most superficial fucknut i've ever come across and and an insecure mofo to add.
did you think that my paragraph below was directed to mirdat?
I'M SORRY BUT MIRDAT IS SO PASSE.
here's a little lowdown for you, just so you know.
i was aware that mirdat is in prison serving time.
i asked you because you would know better and it'll help to clarify with you instead of believing what others talk.
and why did i suddenly think about mirdat?
BECAUSE MY SCHOOL KEPT EMPHASIZING THE YELLOW RIBBON PROJECT THAT SUPPORTS IMPRISONED PEOPLE WHO SHOULD DESERVE A SECOND CHANCE.
and since it has to do with imprisonment and the fact that your love is in prison, everything linked.
that's how thoughts started to run and i personally asked you.
WHY ON EARTH WOULD I STEAL YOUR BOYFRIEND WHO IS IN PRISON?
i'm sorry i am sounding harsh but face reality because it's going to blow up in your face.
so just do yourself and everyone a favour,
1. face up to reality.
2. quit making false accusations.
3. ask before you make a wrong comment.
4. your boyfriend is in prison so quit being insecure about anyone stealing him.
5. learn what 'how now brown cow' means.
6. stop having this thinking that everyone is out to get you and him.
7. appreciate what people are trying to do for you.
8. look beyond your insecurity and actually see the good intentions.
i think i just had about enough of you.
HUR.
- - - cut
I WANT TO HOLD YOUR HAND AGAIN <3 I WANT TO HOLD YOUR HAND AGAIN <3
I WANT TO HOLD YOUR HAND AGAIN <3 I WANT TO HOLD YOUR HAND AGAIN <3
I WANT TO HOLD YOUR HAND AGAIN <3 I WANT TO HOLD YOUR HAND AGAIN <3
I WANT TO HOLD YOUR HAND AGAIN <3 I WANT TO HOLD YOUR HAND AGAIN <3
I WANT TO HOLD YOUR HAND AGAIN <3 I WANT TO HOLD YOUR HAND AGAIN <3
I WANT TO HOLD YOUR HAND AGAIN <3 I WANT TO HOLD YOUR HAND AGAIN <3
I WANT TO HOLD YOUR HAND AGAIN <3 I WANT TO HOLD YOUR HAND AGAIN <3
I WANT TO HOLD YOUR HAND AGAIN <3 I WANT TO HOLD YOUR HAND AGAIN <3
I WANT TO HOLD YOUR HAND AGAIN <3 I WANT TO HOLD YOUR HAND AGAIN <3
I WANT TO HOLD YOUR HAND AGAIN <3 I WANT TO HOLD YOUR HAND AGAIN <3
- - - cut
TALK ABOUT INTERESTING!
librans too are among the most civilized of the twelve zodiacal characters and are often good looking.
they have elegance, charm and good taste, are naturally kind, very gentle, and lovers of beauty, harmony (both in music and social living) and the pleasures that these bring.
they have good critical faculty and are able to stand back and look impartially at matters which call for an impartial judgment to be made on them.
but they do not tolerate argument from anyone who challenges their opinions, for once they have reached a conclusion, its truth seems to them self-evident; and among their faults is an impatience of criticism and a greed for approval.
but their characters are on the whole balanced, diplomatic and even tempered.
librans are sensitive to the needs of others and have the gift, sometimes to an almost psychic extent, of understanding the emotional needs of their companions and meeting them with their own innate optimism - they are the kind of people of whom it is said, "they always make you feel better for having been with them."
they are very social human beings.
they loathe cruelty, viciousness and vulgarity and detest conflict between people, so they do their best to cooperate and compromise with everyone around them.
their cast of mind is artistic rather than intellectual, though they are usually too moderate and well balanced to be avant garde in any artistic endeavor.
the negative tibran character may show frivolity, flirtatiousness and shallowness.
it can be changeable and indecisive, impatient of routine, colorlessly conventional and timid, easygoing to the point of inertia, seldom angry when circumstances demand a show of annoyance at least; and yet librans can shock everyone around them with sudden storms of rage.
one negative aspect about the libran is that they can become gossippers.
12:07:00 PM
her point of view;
Tuesday, September 20, 2005
8 days till 8teen.
" <3 your weekly polyester bride."
10:25:00 PM
her point of view;
Monday, September 19, 2005
i've my say and this is my space, so in all randomness, i have an issue to address.
the first being:
with the recent launch of the 'yellow ribbon' project, it has made me ponder about a particular person.
due to the nature of the issue, the person will be left unnamed.
my school is somewhat in support of the project.
a percentage of the school community wears a yellow ribbon and during our breaks, a song (tie a yellow ribbon around the old oak tree) is aired in the canteen.
just last week, whilst in the midst of my examination, the song was aired.
with this, came the thought of him and i found i had more unanswered questions then i did before.
word has it, he is doing his time.
if this is true (i really hope not), i would really like to talk to him soon.
he deserves the chance and opportunity to change.
i have forgiven what has happened in the past and i am looking forward to see youuu soon, really.
get a load of me, get a load of you
walkin' down the street, and i hardly know you
it's just like we were meant to be
holding hands with you when we're out at night
got a girlfriend, you say it isn't right
and i've got someone waiting too
what if this is just the beginning?
we're already wet, and we're gonna go swimming
why can't i breathe whenever i think about you?
why can't i speak whenever i talk about you?
it's inevitable, it's a fact that we're gonna get down to it
so tell me
why can't i breathe whenever i think about you?
isn't this the best part of breakin' up?
finding someone else you can't get enough of,
someone who wants to be with you too
it's an itch we know we are gonna scratch
gonna take a while for this egg to hatch
but wouldn't it be beautiful?
here we go, we're at the beginning
we haven't fucked yet, but my head's spinning
why can't i breathe whenever i think about you?
why can't i speak whenever i talk about you?
it's inevitable, it's a fact that we're gonna get down to it
so tell me
why can't i breathe whenever i think about you?
high enough for you to make me wonder
where it's goin'
high enough for you to pull me under
somethin's growin'
outta this that we can't control
baby i'm dyin'
why can't i breathe whenever i think about you?
why can't i speak whenever i talk about you?
7:16:00 PM
her point of view;
Thursday, September 15, 2005
let's get emotional girls to wear mood rings.
miss tai, javier will return to civilisation soon.
so do yourself a favour, stop talking to lilo or your bolster.
i'm a table and a phone call away if you get the spasms :)))
11:08:00 PM
her point of view;
Monday, September 12, 2005
(i look like i belong to a female half-way house)
thursday and joleen and i and swimming and eye bags and unwashed and unblown hair and a ton of problems behind that smile.
a few questions that i need to know
how you could ever hurt me so
i need to know what i've done wrong
and how long it's been going on
was it that i never paid enough attention
or did i not give enough affection
not only will your answers keep me sane
but i'll know never to make the same mistake again
you can tell me to my face
or even on the phone,
you can write it in a letter
either way i have to know
did i never treat you right
did i always start the fight
either way i'm going out of my mind
all the answers to my questions i have to find
i have a paper heart <3
8:40:00 PM
her point of view;
Sunday, September 11, 2005
everything i can think of is going absolute downhill.
be it physically, mentally and emotionally.
i'm mentally not prepared for the examinations scheduled for the next two weeks.
i'm mentally not prepared for the stress and very hard mug sessions i will need to succumb to, start from monday.
i'm mentally not prepared to hear HER out.
i'm mentally not prepared for my father's uptight decision on removing my tattoo, which i'm guessing is my 18th birthday gift to me.
(he says i need to save the cash for the operation and it will be removed before the end of the month)
i'm mentally frustrated.
i'm physically not prepared to get my body scarred over the tattoo removal process.
i'll be physically scarred?
emotionally, is a whole other issue which only my closest will understand.
two scenarios;
1. (let's hope, wish and pray) he forgets about it, realises the harm it'll do to my body and decides to scrap the whole removal idea, I WILL BE THRILLED AND VERY VERY VERY RELIEVED.
2. he still is with the idea, and somehow pushes me to go for the removal, I WILL NOT COME HOME UNTIL HE CHANGES HIS MIND.
i will do this without having to care whether i'm halfway between my prelims :)))
(and with all this in mind, my father knew about the tattoo and only said one is enough, of which i only have one)
guess he's just being anal.
12:52:00 PM
her point of view;
(in angst and raging emotions, but i will blog for the sake of the absolutely fanfuckingtastic events that've bypassed this week)
thursday, jol came over for a swim and my mummy made both of us dinner.
friday, narene did just the same but we dinner-ed at sentosa in the evening and sat by the beach for drinks with michelle and koko.
saturday, we went yacht-ing, which turned out quite an experience!
saturday evening, i met up with jol for spanish cuisine by the river and met three white man pissing by a taxi stand.
within that hour, i turned from what was trigger happy to fucking angry.
with that on a heavy note, i'm going to sleep.
farewell, it has been the longest day i've ever had.
P.S. why?
12:51:00 AM
her point of view;
Thursday, September 08, 2005
hello folks. jojo here
she's treating me to cheap cheap spanish food tmr after church (:
that sweet girl has new pix of me on her pink wall. along with 'red carpet'ish one with gwen
nice. too bad i don't frame my photos on my walls. i would need 200 green frames.
i have some sound bites for all you.
nelly furtado - one-trick pony. has been on repeat on my ipod since forever (infact her folklore cd)
rufus wainright - across the universe. yummy. claris sang it to me last night.
ok im going home soon.
i'm so filled with love for months now. i've been a good girl to claris.
clara hasn't. this 100% naughty doll with a unicorn tattoo has been fooling around.
i want a tattoo on my neck that will say 'skin'
i will. when i make claris!
Love from me! joleen.
ps. clara's new collie is a cutie!
8:32:00 PM
her point of view;
a conversation on MSN between myself and carleel.
me: it's been so long
the last time i spoke to you, my hair couldn't even be tied
not even a single strand
and now, it can be tied into a nice ponytail!
PONYTAIL!
that's how long you've not spoken to me
carleel: haha okayy
iliketoexaggerate@hotmail.com!
me: you're an arse
carleel: spank you
---cut
EXTREME EYE-CANDY.
the pencil-thin ipodnano package : )))
I WANT, I WANT AND I WANT!
12:13:00 PM
her point of view;
Wednesday, September 07, 2005
(audiocandy; maria mena - sorry)
vauge sound of rain
pierces through my song again
but i get distracted by the way her toes move when she plays
so i let it burn
i just poured my heart out
there's bits of it on the floor
and i take what's left of it and rinse it under cold water
and call him up for more
and i say baby, yes i feel stupid to call you, but i'm lonely
and i don't think you meant it when you said you couldn't love me
and i thought maybe if i kissed the way you do, you'd feel it too
she said i'm sorry
so sorry
i'm sorry
so sorry
she grabs my wrist
as my fingers turn into angry fists
and i wisper why can't you love me, I'll change for you
i'll play the part.
-----cut
and there again, jol rescued me yesternight.
previously, i had the ice cream.
yesternight, she had the ice cream.
i left westridge with a lighter weight of problems and silly peektures. (it will be uploaded)
i'm indebted for your ice cream, time and effort, listening ear and bed for rolling about in delirium.
: )))))))))).
two nights ago, my father questioned me as to what i would like for my birthday.
he mentioned, it had to be realistic.
my defination of realistic cannot be compared to his.
realistic to me:
/motorola razr cellphone in black,
/ava glam banana bag and checkbook wallet from guess,
/black and white two tone ballerina's from chanel
/a pair of wedges from the shoe loft,
/MAC make-up set including,
MAC fluidline eyeline in blacktrack,
MAC studio fix two-way foundation,
MAC select moisturecover,
MAC powder blush duo.
THAT'S REALITY.
something i stumbled across which i find every bit more interesting that my textbooks, for now.
so here's my esteemed choices for make-up do's.
2:39:00 PM
her point of view;
Tuesday, September 06, 2005
(this is going to be a very emotional entry)
besides family being on the first priority, i have come to realise how much my friends weigh just the same.
it is without doubt that your family will stand by you no matter how small or large an issue you have, even though they do not constantly remind you.
think, would your girl friends be there when you're caught in a large issue you can't handle on your own?
last night, it hit me or rather, she did.
joleen, reminded me about our friendship despite being very occupied.
a convo, a sorry and wanting to be a friend to me.
time, school and errands have drifted us so far apart that we've not talked in proper for months.
we've not had a nano-second to play a listening ear to each.
though we live a road behind each other, we've hardly sat down to hear each out.
thankyouverymuch for what you said to me last night, really.
and to remind you, whenever you're feeling empty, i'm a call/road away from you to bring you ben and jerry's to your doorstep : )))
YOU'RE MY JOJOGAL!
here's to add on a post-it: we're on for friday.
another two helluva loads, maltin and gwen.
maltin, you constantly keep my mind working with all the interesting, INTERESTING questions that make you ponder.
despite the last one being about people dying inbetween where we were.
because we brought in happier issues like birth, people getting married, people getting divorced (not that this is one is a happy one), people in love, people having sex (bizarre).
nothing beats a friendship with a burmese.
gwen, the temporary friend.
we walk in and out of the friendship whenever we please.
i can't explain.
wildwildwet, basketball, moon tanning, chasing, arguing, bread for breakfast, trip-over-the-ice, fireworks, cycling, sleeping,
your house, my house, running errands with me, sentose, painting, eggs, army/rancid shirt, lanvin, art museum, ghost hunting, the lockers, letters, candy, my birthday and every inbetween.
a mental picture, CLICK AND SNAP.
"hot vanilla and condensed milk".
it's breastfeeding time.
5:45:00 PM
her point of view;
Monday, September 05, 2005
(i'm all ears and i'm all scars
to hear you tell me "________".
i'm hanging on.
but you still know the way to make my makeup run.)
read the quote above and make me feel a little better please.
on a lesser depressing and a much more ecstatic note, zaharri got hitched on sunday
afternoon.
things are going to alter.
due to hitch, there will be no more coffee meet-ups or talking on the phone at odd hours.
this comes with much common sense since he is married man.
but all in all, i'm in extreme awe.
the punk has finally taken love to the next level.
:)))
(TICK) wear the dress and take the MRT, whether i have a choice or not.
(TICK) zaharri's wedding, accompanied by narene.
(TICK) take ample MRT trips.
(TICK) inbetween plans for bugis and arab street.
(TICK) drop by narene's place to change off the formals and drop off the load.
(TICK) the night safari with narene, azly and I FORGOT HIS NAME?
(TICK) stayover at narene's after.
(TICK) chicken rice for lunch.
(TICK) provoke the bats at the night safari. (private joke)
so all's done.
I AM OVER AND OUT AND GOING TO KOON.
5:01:00 PM
her point of view;
Thursday, September 01, 2005
"there's always something so tragic
about a hopeless romantic."
7:16:00 PM
her point of view;
